Chicken Ranch anniversary: CLOSURE!

On this date in 1973, the infamous Chicken Ranch brothel of La Grange, Texas, closed its doors for good. The closure followed a week (give or take--it's been tough to pin down exact dates) of broadcasts by Houston TV station KTRK's consumer affairs reporter Marvin Zindler, accusing the brothel of corruption and conspiracy. The Chicken Ranch had survived attempts to close it before, but the white-hot media spotlight proved too much for it. Today marks the 46th anniversary of its closure.

On this date in 2016, however, another milestone was reached, with the official release of Inside the Texas Chicken Ranch: The Definitive Account of the Best Little Whorehouse. Has it been three years already? Apparently so, but it's hard to believe. The six years I put into it seem to have paid off as far as critics are concerned, with the book's reception being as close to across-the-board positive as is reasonably possible.

Just a reminder--book reviews help tremendously. If you've read Inside the Texas Chicken Ranch and are willing to do so, even a short sentence or two on Amazon, Goodreads or other online book site would help get the book in front of new eyes and spread awareness. Thanks!

Inside the Texas Chicken Ranch: The Definitive Account of the Best Little Whorehouse is available from both Amazon.com and BarnesAndNoble.com. It's also available as an ebook in the following formats: Kindle, Nook, Google Play, iBooks and Kobo.

Now Playing: Stan Getz Quintet Stan Getz vol. 1
Chicken Ranch Central

Chicken Ranch anniversary: Marvin Zindler (1921-2007)

On this date in 2007, KTRK consumer affairs reporter Marvin Zindler died of pancreatic cancer.

Zindler, of course, is forever linked with the Chicken Ranch, as his series of exposés on the brothel directly led to its closure. And for that reason, many people (mostly men) who are old enough to remember curse his name. Despite being a raging egomaniac, he was a powerful champion of the downtrodden in his lifetime, and did a tremendous amount of good. Where the Chicken Ranch was concerned, he let his lust for fame and the spotlight get the better of him, and this allowed people with a vendetta against the Chicken Ranch to manipulate him from a distance. Zindler was a person who firmly believed in his own righteous infallibility, and once it became clear the vast organized crime conspiracy behind the Chicken Ranch's operation did not exist, well, Zindler doubled down on the conspiracy angle rather than admitting he'd been duped. He went to his grave insisting on criminal conspiracy and corruption, although he was never able to prove any of his claims.

Despite this, nobody could argue Zindler wasn't committed to his job. He accomplished a tremendous amount of good throughout his career, championing the downtrodden and exposing slum lords, unscrupulous car salesmen and all manner of predators exploiting people who had neither the money nor power to fight back. But they had Zindler on their side. Despite constant pain from the cancer destroying him, Zindler insisted on delivering his famed restaurant report from his hospital bed on July 20. It proved to be his final report. Just over a week later, he was dead.

Inside the Texas Chicken Ranch: The Definitive Account of the Best Little Whorehouse is available from both Amazon.com and BarnesAndNoble.com. It's also available as an ebook in the following formats: Kindle, Nook, Google Play, iBooks and Kobo.

Now Playing: Sting Brand New Day
Chicken Ranch Central

Friday Night Videos

Anyone who's paid attention to me at all over the past 35-plus years will know I'm a fan of the Kinks. Huge fan. In 1984 I missed my one chance to see them live in the Sam Houston Coliseum by two days (although I've since caught Ray's solo show and almost saw Dave solo as well). I appreciate a good cover, but unfortunately most covers are either slavish remakes or distort the original song so much the integral essence of what made it special in the first place. That's why Mikaela Davis' cover of "David Watts" has me gobsmacked: her interpretation is so fresh and original and true to the original that I still find it hard to wrap my head around what she's accomplished. Bravo!

Previously on Friday Night Videos... João Gilberto.

Now Playing: The Police Message in a Box
Chicken Ranch Central

Friday Night Videos

João Gilberto, the father of bossa nova, died a few weeks ago. The man was an amazing talent. Some of you may have noticed that I've developed an interest in tiki in recent years. In my home tiki bar, bossa nova is just as likely to be heard as exotica or calypso or hapa haole or any other tropical-style of music. And of that, at any given time it's likely to be Gilberto playing. "Desafinado" is one of his most-covered songs, and listening to his virtuoso rendition of it, it's easy to understand why.

Previously on Friday Night Videos... R.E.M..

Now Playing: Pink Floyd Relics
Chicken Ranch Central

They're gonna romp! And stomp!

I haven't posted much here about the Chicken Ranch lately (or really, much of anything--life intervenes) but I've got a good one to share today. This evening I shall be making the short drive up to Wimberley to take in the Wimbeley Players' production of The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas. As is my wont with these things, I shall be arriving early and staying late to answer questions from the audience, cast, crew and random passers-by about the real Chicken Ranch and the shenanigans that went on there back in the day. It's always a good time, but I'm just the sideshow here--the play's the thing, and I've heard excellent buzz about this production. If you've only ever seen the theatrical version with Burt and Dolly, I strongly encourage you to check out the play if you can. There's so much here that the movie simply ignored, and that's a shame. Most of the run is sold out, but give the box office a call, as they may have a few tickets squirreled away here or there.

Inside the Texas Chicken Ranch: The Definitive Account of the Best Little Whorehouse is available from both Amazon.com and BarnesAndNoble.com. It's also available as an ebook in the following formats: Kindle, Nook, Google Play, iBooks and Kobo.

Now Playing: Edmundo Ros Edmundo Ros Vol. 10: 1951 Playtime in Brazil
Chicken Ranch Central

Friday Night Videos

Despite their gradual slide into irrelevance and ultimate disbanding, there was a time when R.E.M. was among the biggest bands ever to ride the airwaves. Michael Stipe and company made hitmaking look so easy back in the day and held more influence than anyone could expect from a alternative college band. Case in point: "Man on the Moon" from their 1992 album Automatic for the People. This song is directly responsible for the Andy Kaufman biopic of the same name, starring Jim Carrey. It's an excellent film with one of Carrey's best acting performances, and to say it wouldn't exist without the popularity of this song is no understatement. The lyrics, like so many by R.E.M., make not one lick of sense, but when you listen to it everything seems correct and in its proper place. There's no small magic involved in that.

Previously on Friday Night Videos... Jackson Browne.

Now Playing: R.E.M. Dead Letter Office
Chicken Ranch Central

Lauhala House

Texas doesn't have much of a tiki culture, historically speaking. There've been Trader Vic's and Don the Beachcomber's in Houston and Dallas, sure, but there's bnever been much in the way of homegrown tiki culture. Several things contribute to this, chief among them being Texas' restrictive liquor laws during the heyday of tiki, and the combined fact that winters are generally mild for much of the state and a significant amount of the land is either clay soil or shallow limestone. Why's that matter? Well, mild winters mean the foundations for homes don't need to be dug deep below the frost line, eliminating basements as a standard feature of homes. And even if residents wanted to add basements anyway, limestone and clay aren't conducive to cost-effective basement digs. The lack of basements corresponds to a lack of underground rumpus rooms and/or tiki bars. The liquor laws precluded the consumption of Mai Tais. Tiki was essentially stillborn in Texas.

A few tiki outposts managed to beat the odds for a while. One was Lahala House in Corpus Christi. Not much is known about it, other than it was primarily a seafood restaurant destroyed by Hurricane Beulah in 1967. THere's a single image of the dining room online, taken from a vintage postcard. Aside from that, nobody I'm aware of even knew what the outside looked like, until now. I recently scored a menu from the place off Ebay, and I have to say, I'm pretty jazzed about it.

Now we know what it looked like. And by golly, it really was right on the water.

The menu opened, with a clip-on bar insert.

The menu sans bar insert. The offerings look like a typical Texas steak-and-seafood restaurant, as opposed to the Chinese offerings many other tiki-themed establishments offered.

The menu also had bar offerings printed on the back, which makes me wonder why the insert was necessary.

As you can see, the bar offerings on the menu and the insert are nearly identical. Maybe the insert didn't originally go with the menu, but was available at the bar? Was there a separate bar area in the restaurant? I have no idea. Note that there are no real tiki cocktails on the menu. I'm assuming sales of spirits such as rum were restricted. Hard to enjoy a Mai Tai without rum!

As if finding the rare menu wasn't enough, just a few days after the menu arrived, a separate Ebay seller posted a matchbook cover! I snapped it up, of course.

The interior contained a miniature menu. That's clever, but anyone reading it has to have excellent eyesight. That print it tiny!

The original address for Lahala House was 4922 1/2 Ave. B, but at some point in the 1960s the streets were renamed, which made it hard to pinpoint where the restaurant was actually located. Enter the matchbook cover, which must've been printed shortly before the place was destroyed by Hurricane Beulah. Gulfbreeze is the street name today, and the address places Lahala House at the northernmost point of the North Beach area, opposite what is now the U.S.S. Lexington and the Texas State Aquarium. The property is empty now, reclaimed by sand and tides. I read online that Lahala House owner Harry Porter opened a new restaurant, the Torch, following the hurricane, but a newspaper clipping I've found from the Austin American-Statesman indicates the Torch, along with a second Lahala House in Austin (which became Steak Island in the late 60s, then the Magic Time Machine in the 70s, followed by Landry's in the 90s and Joe's Crab Shack in the 00s) were both in operation by 1965. So that's a little bit of Texas tiki history. I'll be sure to share more when I have it.

Now Playing: Yma Sumac The Ultimate Yma Sumac Collection
Chicken Ranch Central