Friday Night Videos

With the bizarre recent death of former Electric Light Orchestra cellist Mike Edwards this week, it seems only fitting to feature ELO on this week's installment of Friday Night Videos. "Showdown" is one of the early hits Edwards played on, and you can see him in this video, along with fellow cellist Colin Walker and Jeff Lynne's scary "Wild Man of the Mountain" hair.



Previously on Friday Night Videos... C+C Music Factory.

Now Playing: ELO Afterglow

Experimenting with mead

Astute readers will remember that I started a three-gallon batch of mead fermenting (that's nine pounds of honey) back in July. After letting it sit far too long, I finally got off my lazy duff and racked it. Not being particularly enamoured of show meads, I had experimental designs on this batch. So I experimented.

Firstly, I racked a portion of the fermented mead into a 2.5 gallon fermentation vessel I have. Into this vessel I had placed approximately 4 pounds of Santa Rosa plums, picked fresh from my backyard tree, sliced and frozen, then thawed and crushed. Santa Rosas have a tartness to them that my jucier, sweeter Methleys don't, so I'm hoping the combination works with the mead to create a strongly-flavored melomel. Into the vessel I added a teaspoon of pectic enzyme, a quarter teaspoon of acid blend and a quarter teaspoon of tannin. The plums may have contributed enough acid and tannin on their own, but I've made too many meads with a flat flavor profile to take any chances. It's got a slow, gentle fermentation going right now, so we'll see how things shake out in the next month or so.

For the remaining mead, which amounted to a little over half a gallon, I racked into a 1.5 gallon fermentation vessel. And here's where I get a little daring. I bought a pound of crushed, smoked malt from Home Brew Party a couple months ago for this very purpose. I'm an extract kit kind of homebrewer, you see. I've done the "boil the mash" thing, and while that approach gives the brewer lots of control over the final product, it was too labor intensive for my enjoyment. But since nobody really sells smoked malt extract, I had to do it myself. I cooked the malt at 150 degrees, more or less, for an hour (there was a protein rest there at the beginning) then drained off the liquid malt and sparged once. The resulting sweet liquid (the smoky scent was strong when I started the starch conversion, but tapered off the longer it was heated) I let cool then added to the racked mead, giving me right at 1 gallon. Then I added slightly less than a teaspoon of acid blend and a like amount of tannin to the mix. It's fermenting slowly now. I have 1.5 pounds of honey I'm going to add to bring the total volume up to 1.5 gallons, at which point I will add one jalapeño pepper to make this a smoked jalapeño metheglin (as opposed to a chipotle metheglin). My previous attempt at a concoction of this nature resulted in Liquid Heat which was very strong on the fresh, raw pepper flavor and full of heat. I want to rein that in a bit to make this more palatable for those who aren't thrill seekers, so I'm going to cut the pepper and remove the seeds first. Heresy, I know. I may even grill the pepper a bit first, to blunt some of that rawness and make the flavor blend more with the smoked malt. In any event, this will be an unusual braggot-style mead once I'm finished. I'll keep you posted on my progress.

Now Playing: Dave Davies Fractured Mindz

The Chicken Ranch: Lucky no. 7

As I continue my quest to find the perfect approach to with which to frame Chicken Ranch's story and nail that opening chapter, it occurs to me that at its heart, this is a mystery. Oh, not the back story, the history, but rather the events that everyone remembers, that made it legend. All of the elements are there--one man's heroic efforts in the face of fierce opposition to investigate rumors of organized crime, accusations of government corruption, secret files passed along in the dead of the night on a brothel that'd managed to stay open for more than a century in plain view of the law that, by rights, should have shut it down. Yes, it surely is a mystery:

Mr. Marvin Zindler, who was usually very late in the mornings, save upon those not infrequent occasions when he was up all night, was seated at the breakfast table. I stood upon the hearth-rug and picked up the manila folder which our visitor had left behind him the night before. It was a fine, thick sheaf of papers, creased and shuffled, of the sort which is known as a `unofficial investigation.' Just across the middle was a broad rubber band nearly half an inch across. `To Marvin Zindler, KTRK, from his friends of the DPS,' was written upon it, with the date `1973.' It was just such a stack as the old-fashioned police investigators used to write up - dignified, solid, and reassuring.

As always, this is a work in progress. Feedback is always encouraged. In case you missed 'em, here are my previous installments:
Version 6
Version 5
Version 4
Version 3
Version 2
Version 1

Now Playing: Night Ranger Greatest Hits

To the zoo!

We took my 90-year-old grandmother to the zoo today. That wasn't part of any grand plan, but it worked out nicely. We've been trying to get to Cuero to visit her more often of late, and Friday I asked Grandma if she'd let me take her to lunch on Sunday. Sometimes she's not enthusiastic about going out, but this time she was agreeable. She insisted, though, that we go someplace of my choosing. Since Cuero doesn't have many decent restaurants, I thought I'd surprise her by taking her to nearby Victoria. And since it's be a shame to make that drive and not do anything else, I remembered that Victoria had a zoo that we might spend some time at afterward.



I've got a bit of history with the Texas Zoo at Victoria. When I was very young--say, 3 years old or thereabouts--my parents took me to visit. I don't remember much, other than the fact they had a broken-down miniature train folks could have ridden at one time, much like the ones in Landa Park, Breckenridge Park and Zilker Park, and baby deer that I got to feed corn to. When my parents took me back a few years later, it was closed for remodeling, and stayed closed for the better part of a decade, it seems. This was my first trip back in close to 38 years.



It's a nice little zoo, although quite small. The focus is on Texas native animals, although they had a few exotics--a couple of very active tigers, some lemurs and two young Barbary lions, which are extinct in the wild and critically endangered even in captivity. There was also the prerequisite petting zoo, featuring a sheep, several grumpy pot-bellied pigs and quite a few miniature goats, including the pugnacious one pictured above. I appreciate the focus on native wildlife, but have to admit I'd have liked to see mountain lions, ocelots, jagarundi, white tailed deer, mule deer, desert bighorn sheep and pronghorn antelope in the zoo. Badgers, prairie dogs, a litter of hyperactive baby possums, some endangered red wolves, a bobcat, coyotes, foxes and javelina were willing to entertain. The white-lipped coati, below, was possibly the most exotic native on display. I'm a little shamefaced to admit I hadn't realized they were native to Texas--I thought they were limited to Brazil. Duh.



Grandma enjoyed the trip immensely. We had lunch at Golden Corral, which, although not a luxury dining establishment by any means, had the barbecued chicken and sweet potatoes and green bean casserole that Grandma enjoyed, plus some hot peach cobbler for dessert. The travel had worn her down a bit, but the zoo had a wheelchair we could use, and I was able to wheel her around the entire zoo so she could see all the animals. Despite protests of not wanting to be a burden, she got a kick out of the free-roaming guineas and peacocks, and watched the exotic animals with fascination. I think she got more entertainment out of my kids' antics, though. At the end of the day she was talking of visiting San Antonio's much larger zoo in the near future--and then going shopping afterward. All in all, a lot of fun for everyone involved.

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Friday Night Videos

C+C Music Factory was quite popular early in my college years. Their music was so energetic and infectious that they got nearly constant airplay, that is, until they vanished completely as bands are wont to do. "Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now)" is the big hit everyone remembers, but the single of theirs I liked the most was "Things That Make You Go Hmmmm...." It's catchy and clever and never fails to make me smile. The video itself is quite stylish. What's not to like?



Previously on Friday Night Videos... Falco.

Now Playing: Ray Davies Working Man's Cafe

Chicken Ranch: Sixth of Six

Armadillocon 32 proved to be a timely break for me. I was able to recharge the creative batteries and discuss the Chicken Ranch book with many folks who kindly offered myriad advice and suggestions. Once they understood what I was trying to do with the opening chapter, they enthusiastically endorsed my efforts and urged me to keep at it. And so I shall.

The story of the Chicken Ranch, in many ways, is one of obsession. Marvin Zindler pursues the great white brothel like a man possessed, and the town of La Grange is caught up in his pursuit through no fault of its own. At its heart, it's something of a tragedy, rife with symbolism. I believe the sheriff is the perfect viewpoint character for such an approach:

Call me Flournoy. Some years ago-- never mind how long precisely-- having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me at the jail, I thought I would drive about a little and see the seamier part of Fayette County. It is a way I have of driving off the spleen and regulating the circulation. Whenever I find myself growing grim about the mouth; whenever it is a damp, drizzly November in my soul; whenever I find myself involuntarily pausing before jail cells, and bringing up the rear of every criminal transfer; and especially whenever my deputies get such an upper hand of me, that it requires a strong moral principle to prevent me from deliberately stepping into the street, and methodically shooting people's hats off-- then, I account it high time to get to the Chicken Ranch as soon as I can. This is my substitute for pistol and ball. With a philosophical flourish Cato throws himself upon his sword; I quietly take to the brothel. There is nothing surprising in this. If they but knew it, almost all men in their degree, some time or other, cherish very nearly the same feelings towards the whores with me.

As always, this is a work in progress. Feedback is always encouraged. In case you missed 'em, here are my previous installments:
Version 5
Version 4
Version 3
Version 2
Version 1

Now Playing: Robert Plant Fate of Nations

BIGGEST TAX INCREASE EVAH! OH NOES!!!!

So I get an email forwarded to me today breathlessly describing how Obama's set to enact the most humongous tax increase in history which will send everyone to the poorhouse where we'll all be converted to atheistic Muslims and be conditioned to cheer as the president rapes my daughters. Actually, those last few bits weren't explicitly stated, but if you read between the lines it's there. Totally.

So anyway, the email was mostly about this Commie black man stealing all the hard-working white folks' money. Which is, you know, the biggest issue facing white America nowadays since those nice Mexican drug lords have solved our illegal immigrant problem by gunning down all the migrant farm workers en mass along the border. The forwarded email is, of course demonstrably misleading. I was going to say demonstrably false, but it occurred to me that by some torturous logic individual words, taken out of any rational context, may well be considered vaguely true. So I'll settle for misleading. It saddens me that such assertions are forwarded without any critical thought given to the content by otherwise intelligent people, but I can't say it surprises me.

The 2001 Bush tax cuts were gifts to millionaires and multinational corporations that destroyed the billion dollar budget surpluses of the Clinton administration ($236 billion in 2000). Ironically, there was no great pent-up demand for these tax cuts, and some business interests even voiced concern over the effect such massive cuts would have on budget. Personally, I've never quite gotten the evangelical fervor that mandates the more taxes are cut, the more revenue the government receives. Common (and economic) sense dictates that there is a break-even point beyond which the returns diminish rapidly.

Those ill-advised tax breaks are expiring now because Congressional budgetary rules prohibit deficit spending beyond the non-partisan Congressional Budget Office's 10-year budgetary projections. So the GOP controlling Congress in 2001 got around this by passing the cuts as a "temporary" measure, lasting only the length of the CBO's 10-year projection, effectively sacrificing fiscal responsibility in order to pander to their political base. If Congressional leaders in 2001--not to mention the Bush administration--had truly been concerned with the fiscal health of our nation, they would have passed these cuts with offsetting spending reductions and made them permanent. They chose not to, yet nobody seems to be questioning this action today.

THIS is why I hold the current crowd of born-again deficit hawks and supposedly fiscally-responsive teabaggers in contempt. Republicans in Congress are screaming about deficit reduction, yet they are insistent on expanding the single biggest contributor to said national debt. This, friends, it the ultimate in hypocrisy. This is not a talking point. This is not a political ax to grind. This is fiscal reality. The budget will not, cannot be balanced without eliminating politically motivated giveaways such as the 2011 tax cuts and Medicare Part D (with projected costs of $727.3 billion through 2018). What happened to the true fiscal conservatives? They're not in Washington, not in the Democratic party and certainly not in the GOP. Why am I not ripping on the Dems as hard? Because frankly, they're not campaigning as the fiscally responsible party with one hand while writing hot checks with the other. The fact that Republican leaders are ignoring and marginalizing Rep. Paul Ryan is proof of that the lip service they are paying to budgetary restraint is no more than that--lip service. I guarantee that if Republicans gain control of Congress and the White House in upcoming elections, in short order today's trillion-dollar deficits will look like chump change. Because, hey, we tried that already in 2001 and look where it got us.

Now Playing: Johnny Cash The Essential Johnny Cash