Tuesday, July 12, 2005

We interrupt this blog for some unscheduled fiction

A while back, almost a year ago in fact, a bit of Catholic dogmatic stupidity set me off in a big way, prompting me to write a short piece of satirical fiction. Initially, I'd planned to post it here, but the few people who read it reacted positively, so I thought I'd shop it around a bit. The responses from these markets generally were of the "Funny! Now leave us alone!" variety. Then, when Pope John Paul II died and his successor elected, it just didn't seem appropriate to send it out anymore. So I filed it away.

Until yesterday. If the Vatican is intent on abandoning decades of reason and turning the Catholic church into some kind of regressive, fundamentalist sect--despite repeated assurances that Benedict is really a nice guy if you just get to know him--then I no longer feel obligated to give this bunch the benefit of the doubt.

So, for your reading pleasure, or offense, or whatever you so choose, I present The Days of Rice and Assault. If movies like Kevin Smith's Dogma or Monty Python's Life of Brian offend you, then you probably ought not to read it. And I'd originally planned to present it with sock-puppet illustrations, but you can't have everything.

Now Playing: The Kinks Did Ya

4 comments:

  1. As I recall (dimly), I thought the paragraph of this story that you printed earlier was pretty funny. I th ink the whole thing's funny, too. Not offensive, though. Maybe that's why it didn't sell.

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  2. Eh, give it time. Somebody will send me hate mail for it. I figure the biggest reason for it not selling (apart from the fact that I'm a hack--but that goes without saying) is that there just aren't that many religious/theological satire markets out there. That, and the fact that it's dated already. Shoulda gone with my first impulse and posted it way back when.

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  3. I understand about the reluctance to publish something in the wake of the John Paul II's passing. I had a fantastic little satirical piece called "Pope Idol" that pretty much explored the election of the new pope via Simon Cowell and his posse. (Jesse Jackson as obligatory large black judge, Martika as obligatory has-been pop singer.) At the last moment, I pulled it. Just couldn't bring myself to be that rude. Heh.

    But it is a damn funny piece.

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  4. Just passing through, I'm liking the blog by the way.

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